Sunday, October 7, 2012

STILL NOT ALRIGHT

Sunday, it is supposed to be a lovely day where you could just sit back and relax to spend some precious time with your love ones. Previously, we woke up , had breakfast and hang out in the mall on weekends. Sadly, I was home early and sleeping through the whole afternoon to avoid thinking what happened this morning.

I need to release my emotional out if not I can die from the pain. For the whole day I have not taken any meal yet till now. Headache strikes since yesterday night after watching Hotel Transylvania in 3D. I am now munching potato chips while sipping a cup of nescafe to blog about how I felt for today.

I pro-claimed myself a very simple girl. (maybe not for others) I don't demand or request much. But once I want something , I will work hard to get it no matter what. Even I fall and failed, at least I have tried before. Simple as that, same theory applies to my relationship as well. When I am with someone , I will do my best to make him happy before me.( yes, that's how silly I am)

Though I could be very sweet and lovely dovey almost all the time, however sometimes I could be very "princessy" attitude. ( I admit ) I do "lao kai" for small matters that you might think is nothing at all. I go crazy and show face cause I care? ( maybe a little too much ) When I am " merajuking", all i want is some comfort to calm me down not go against me neither ignore.  (shows that you don't give a damn)

I take words seriously. If you couldn't make it, please don't make promises. It's like making a girl to happy for  5 minutes now, and hurt her later. What's the point? It doesn't mean I don't want you to make promises , in fact I want you to keep your words. Don't simply say something that's effortless, nice to hear but meaningless.

At the same time, I know I have to learn to be more understanding. I am trying just so you know sometimes I just close one eye to tell myself " It's just a very small matter, leave it." I don't like to quarrel or argue for some stupid brainless thing and cause us unhappy. The more I don't care, it will cause to numb, in the end feelingless. Once hit the limitation, it will explode. (or I shall get use to it?)

When it's my fault, I will definitely admit. (expect that the other way round too) I don't beat around the bush. If it's not my fault, I will never give a damn shit about it. I don't expect apology nor do i need it badly. I just want you to know where is your mistake instead of throwing back the question like " how", "why" and etc. ( dont expect me to tell you everything,sort it out yourself)

One thing bad about me is I expect the answer I wanna hear when I ask you a question. If i don't get it, I will merajuk again. ( I thought i could be myself? sadly, it's a NO NO) Being negative is cause by the phobia of previous relationship. Hope you understand this.

It's one month being together already. So what? I am spending this particular day with myself blogging about how emotional I am. shucks right?

Not so happy one month overall....





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